なんて、とかなんと、とか、ダラダラダラダラ

英語の方が楽なんで、、
ranting on about stuff. highlight if you want.

I'm just gonna say whatever's on my mind. I really don't care if I curse or anything. So... for people who are easily offended, or to easily misunderstand, I warn you to not go beyond reading from this point.

Recently there's been this whole mess of NLBLGL and whatnot. I first heard from billies viz txt that everybody is switching to NL or something. And I immediately think it's my fault, cuz though I'm not good at drawing lovey-dovey scenes, I do incorporate a bland feel of that here and there. I always tried to be careful of what I drew and posted though. I knew I couldn't do some stuff, for example, this craze with merilu... Out of all the OC's I've created, Merilu is the one I care for the most. She's been my first OC that I've stuck with since middle school, and then along the way came Anyo and Joe... And then another story was created with Anya and Eina and Ian and whatever... Even out of all these characters, I tend to create and imagine a lot of stories with merilu being the main character. When AI was first created, I contemplated between Anyo and Merilu a lot. Should I introduce Anyo or Merilu? In the end, Anyo was chosen because she already had a relationship with Leo and Lance from a previous pchat. After that, I planned not to bring out any other characters, but with the request of people, and the thought with the lack of girls, I brought out Merilu. And then Anya. Though I don't think Anya would be RPing much in AI because of the way the story is set. So I don't think I'll have much of a problem with Anya and her existence at AI. Anyways, Merilu... God, I did't mean to bring in such trouble with her. I brought her out as a side character, but I started bringing her out much more because some people liked her. But the problems with her and the relationship between everybody else is so hard. Some people hate that she's being 'paired' with other characters, and honestly, everytime they say that, it just makes me feel even more guilty for bringing her into AI. I know they probably don't mean that, but the thought of it just makes me wonder, maybe they think she's a whore or something. And then I think that the dilemma of faraxhar was partly merilu's fault. And then in the end, everything is her fault. I'm the type of person who thinks up the worst case scenerios, and thinks a lot about what other people thinks, and then I turn all emo about it. These types of thoughts comes occassionally, but the thought that it has to do with merilu just gets me down even more. I've been keeping my thoughts about merilu pairings to myself. I may have spilled like oh, i like her and this guy, or i comment that that'd be interesting sometimes, but I always knew deep down that I couldn't make it come true. And really, I didn't want to make it come true, cuz I didn't want complications between characters, and further more, with my friends. Because all in all, my friends are all I care about, and I don't want to lose the bond that we all share. Right now, I really don't want to talk about Merilu being a part of anything... I don't feel like bringing her out anymore. I don't even want to post the pochi comic because it mentions some merilu pairings. If it comes down to it, I've been thinking a lot about taking merilu out of AI. By the way, just to make things clear, I do like Farant&Merilu. I don't care what you have to say about it. I like a lot of pairings that you don't know about. My thought is my own, I'll change it when I want to. But I'll promise that I won't do/draw/write anything about them, cuz in conclusion, I care more about what other people want and think. I may not notice everybody's needs, but I'll assure you this promise. So... I say sorry to all those whom I've brought complexity. It wasn't meant to harm anybody, but I guess that's just how it flowed. I apologize for my mistakes.

Huh. I didn't curse at all ahaha. Other than that, I've tested out this one site by the request of fo, and it made me feel better and forget stuff for the time being :) Sorry, I'll reply to comments in the next post ><;;;